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B'More Good Grief

Réné Pallace, CPCC

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    Réné Pallace
    B'More Good Grief
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The Caregiver

4/13/2020

 
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Doesn’t everything die at last and too soon?  Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your  one wild and precious life? "~ Mary Oliver

The first time I remember hearing the word caregiver was from my dad. My mother had suffered a tragic accident and had spent months in hospitals. She was finally ready to come home.  He committed to be her caregiver, as if you “watch the things you gave your life to, broken, and stoop and build ‘em up with worn out tools...” ~Rudyard Kipling, If.  My dad had a strong back, a missionary heart, and ears that no longer worked very well.  He loved my mother, and he loved our family.  His “practice of gratitude is not about dismissing sadness, anger, fear, or confusion. Rather, it offers us the opportunity to see that we often experience multiple feelings at once; to welcome joy into the same places where we hold grief; to turn our attention to what is quietly growing and breathing day by day, which, to our possible surprise, includes ourselves." ~ Kristin Lin, Editor, The On Being Project.  

“There are only four kinds of people in this world.  Those who have been caregivers, those who are currently caregivers, those who will be caregivers, and those who will need caregivers.” ~Rosalynn Carter, former First Lady, USA; Founder of the Rosalynn Carter Institute for Caregiving.

These quarantined days may tease us about what life might look like for us as caregivers. Time loses its authority. Days slip by and into each other as if all we have is yesterday, today and tomorrow. There is a desperation that there is always something more you think you need, more to do, that what you do is never enough. Exhaustion which comes from always listening for the call for help. “Courage is not simply one of the virtues but the form of every virtue at the testing point.”~ C.S. Lewis. Feeling inadequate for not being able to make a clean, happy ending. Grateful for one more day. Relief at having made it to the time for sleep where the paralyzed kneel to tend their gardens again and swing themselves back into the saddle to run with the hunt.  “We.needto.think.about.eachother.and.begrateful.and.to.sendlove.”~Alice-May Purkiss, @lifedeathwhat.  

Jessica Zitter, MD, MPH, is one of the architects of our End of Life movement. She believes that “Caregiving is the most important health care crisis no one is talking about.”  Her convictions and experiences are coming in a soon to be released movie, "Caregiver, A Love Story". Please enjoy the trailer here below. 

Save your gloves, you are going to need them. “If you extend acts of kindness, you bring order to the chaos” ~Karen Kedar, God Whispers.  

Be well. Be kind.  Take good care of you.  ​​
"Caregiver: A Love Story."
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Réné Pallace
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rene@bmoregoodgrief.com